Beautiful Destiny
by adamarie19
Summary: What if the night Travis told Abby he loved her, she didn't say it back. What if instead she let her pride get the best of her and stayed with Parker even though she was completely in love with Travis. Will Travis continue to fight for her, or will he return to his own ways?
1. Chapter 1

_**So I just read beautiful Disaster this past Friday, It only took me a few hours to read it and I fell in love. And what better way to express your love for then to write Fanfiction? Please to tell me how you like it and I apologize for grammar.**_

"_**I know you deserve better than me, you think I don't know that? But if there was any woman made for me, it's you. I'll do whatever I have to, Pidge. Do you hear me, I'll do anything. I'll stop fighting the second I graduate. I won't drink a single drop again. I'll give you the happy ever after, Pigeon. If you just believe in me, I can do it. "**_

Abby replayed the words over and over in her head as she lay in her bed night. She wanted so badly to take Travis in her arms, to make love to him all over again as she did the last night she spent in his apartment. Her pride got the best of her though, she couldn't say the words back after he told her he loved her. Deep down inside, she knew she loved him just as much as he loved her, but she couldn't say the words out loud. What the hell was she doing? She was "dating" Parker, although she wouldn't exactly call it dating, but she was in love with Travis, none of this was right. She was being selfish and deep down she knew that. She came here to get rid of her past, she came here to start a new life of happiness and yet Travis resembled everything she ran away from. He told her that he didn't deserve her, but in reality it was her who didn't deserve him. She was thankful that her roommate had decided to crash somewhere else for the night, she knew it was probably because of her but she didn't care. She pulled the blankets closer to as the tears poured out of her face. She didn't hear the knock, or the door open as America rushed to her side.

"Abby, what the hell is going on? " She demanded as she sat on the edge of Abby's bed. She hated seeing her best friend this way. It was nearly four and the morning, but that didn't stop her from rushing over here as the phone rang repeatedly until she answered

"What are you doing here Mare? " Abby asked, wiping her eyes and sitting up to face her best friend, she knew she'd get a lecture about how she was only torturing herself and Travis.

"Shep called me, millions of times I might add. He told me Travis is a wreck. He thought it might have something to do with you. I know you were with him earlier, and I need to know what happened. "

"It doesn't matter now, I've screwed everything up. " Abby said, feeling the hole in her heart becoming bigger

"Hey, what's going on? " America asked again, as she looked to Abby who just liked a broken mess

"He told me he loved me. " Abby said finally after several moments of sobs.

"Isn't that good news? Shouldn't the two of you be out celebrating right now? "

"I didn't say it back, I pushed him again and I came inside, leaving him alone. " Abby commented as she wiped her new tears away

"What the hell Abby? What the hell are you doing? "

"I can't be with him. You know what'll happen. I'm not good enough for him. "

"Yes you are, the two of you are obviously meant to be together, Abby. He loves you and you can deny it all you want, but I know you love him too. If you didn't, you wouldn't be sitting here in your dorm all alone crying. That's not you. "

"I do love him, but sometimes love isn't always enough. "

"It is with Travis. He's made a complete turn around since meeting you. You can't just crush his heart like this. Shep said he's in a really bad place, he's locked himself in his room, blasted his music and he won't come out. "

Abby felt her heart break again as she realized just how much she hurt him. Who would have known that she'd be the girl that Travis would give his heart to?

"It doesn't matter anymore because I can't take back that I ran away, he'd never forgive me. "

"Go to him, right now. Tell him that you love him, don't drag this on. Let him love you and stop pushing him away. "

"I can't, not tonight. I just need to sleep right now, Mare. Maybe tomorrow." Abby said but deep down she wouldn't go tomorrow either. She was a coward and she accepted that.

"I'll stay with you, but you have to know just how much he loves and adores you. I've never see him so happy, he even bought you that puppy just so that you'd always have an excuse to come back to the apartment. You have to know that you're only going to hurt yourself the most in all of this. Travis is reckless, he's daring, adventurous and he takes risks but even as rough around the edges as he is, you've turned him into this big marshmallow that I've never seen before. We all see a side of him that we've never experienced before and we love it. Don't ruin that just because you're afraid your past will become your present. "

"I'll deal with it tomorrow. "

Sleep found her soon after, but that didn't keep the dreams of Travis away.


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter 2**

_**Thank you guys so much for all your reviews so much. You rock! I hope you enjoy this chapter. Please feel free to review some more. :D **_

The sun rising through the window woke Abby up the next morning, she didn't even open her eyes before thoughts of Travis came rushing back to her. How was all of this possible? How could she push the one person that meant the most to her out of her life? She loved him, she knew that much but what possible relationship could she have with him? Tears pricked her eyes as she began to sit, America was still asleep beside her bed. She knew she couldn't face her right now, she couldn't face any of it. Getting out of bed, she showered, dressed, and grabbed her phone and left her dorm. She knew that once America woke up, she'd be in trouble yet again, but couldn't think of any of it right now. She didn't realize where she was going, she just walked. Hearing her name being called behind her, she didn't want to turn around, she knew exactly who it was.

"Abs. "Parker said, finally catching up with her

"Hey, Parker what's up? " She asked. The last thing she wanted to do was deal with him right now. She couldn't take it. She was "dating" Travis, but she felt nothing at all for him, not in comparison as to what she felt for Travis. _Travis. _Why couldn't she have just forget about her stubborn pride and tell him she loved him too?

"Wanna hang out? "

"Parker, I can't. Not today, I have plans. "

"With Travis? "

"I can see you're still mad that I wouldn't cancel my date to the party with him for you. "

"I know we're not technically boyfriend and girlfriend, but I don't see why you won't come with me instead of him. I'm better suited for you, Abs. I can make you happy if you just give me the chance. "Parker said to her, grabbing her around the waste. Before she knew it his lips were on hers, but she just didn't feel it. The only lips she wanted to be kissing were Travis's but she screwed everything up, it was just too late now.

"Parker, stop. I can't do this right now. "Abby told him in a soft whisper as she pushed him away

"Can't or won't? "

"What's the difference? " Abby questioned. The last thing she wanted to do was hurt Parker, but wouldn't it have hurt worse if she led him on? Just because she was torturing herself and her own happiness, didn't mean everyone else had to suffer with her.

"Can't means you just can't, but won't means that you don't want to. "

"Well then it's won't. " Abby said. She was fed up with it all. She cared about Parker, but not as much as she cared for Travis, the only difference is Travis never pushed her to do things she didn't want to, as Parker tried to push her to give him a chance when there was nothing there.

"Why won't you give us a chance, Abs? "

"I love him. "

Parker said nothing. He didn't know how to respond.

"Who? " He whispered, he knew it was a stupid question but he was at loss for any other words

"Travis, I love Travis, okay? He's my every thought, my every dream, I long for his hugs, his kisses, and his touch. But I've ruined anything. And just because I can't be with him doesn't' mean I'm going to be with you. No matter how much I fight it, the connection I have with him is stronger than anything I'll ever have with you. "Abby finally said. She didn't want to hold it in anymore, she wanted to let the whole world that she was completely in love with Travis Maddox

"That hurts. " Parker admitted to her, taking a step back

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry that I hurt you but I can't deny how I feel anymore. Goodbye Parker. "Abby said and turning around she was faced with the one person she didn't want to hear the conversation she just had. Travis

"You love me? " He asked, standing in front of her. He looked as miserable as she felt. He had an ace bandage on his right hand.

"You weren't supposed to hear that Travis." She said in a whisper

"You love me. " He told her, it wasn't a question

"Yes, Travis, I love you. I love everything about you. The way you call me Pigeon, the way you look at me, the way you stand up for me, the way you touch me, the way you kiss me, I love it all okay? But love isn't enough. We'll crash and burn. "

"Don't go. Please, I need you, Abby. I love you and I know you love me too so why won't you let me in? "Travis asked his hands cupping her face as the passionately stared into each other's eyes

"I can't. … I want to so badly, but Travis, there are things you just don't know about me. And I can't do this. "

"Yes you can. I believe in you, I believe in us. I told you that I know I don't deserve you, but I'm a selfish man I can't let you go. "

"Haven't you been listening to anything I've said Travis, it's not you that doesn't deserve me. It's me who doesn't deserve you. "Abby yelled as people started to stare,

"What do you mean you don't deserve me? You've never done anything wrong, you're innocent, sweet and kind. "

"That's not true Travis, I'm not any of those things. You don't know my past. "Abby told him in a truth. He knew nothing about it, he knew nothing about Mick, and how she'd end up being exactly like him.

"Then talk to me, let me in. I want you, I want you forever. Your joys, your heartache, I want it all. "Travis Pleaded

"You deserve better, I won't be the girl to tear you down. "she felt the tears run down her face as she ran away from him. She ran as fast as she could back to the dorm room in hopes that he wouldn't follow.


	3. Chapter 3

_**Thank you guys so much for reading and reviewing this story, it means so much. Thanks for all your support and I apologize for the grammar mistakes :D **_

Travis watched Abby run away after admitting that she loved him. It was all he wanted to hear since realizing his own feelings for her, yet it wasn't enough for her to commit to him. Why? He knew one thing, he wouldn't give up. He didn't care about the drinking he knew he could go do, he didn't care about all the women who threw themselves at him, he didn't even care about the fights that he could go win, all he knew in that moment, was he was going to prove to Abby that he was worth giving a chance to. And whatever she thought made her not deserve him, was wrong, because it wasn't her that didn't deserve him, it was the other way around. He was going to do whatever it took to get her back. He once told Abby that his bike was the love of his life, but he was soon realizing that he could live without his bike, but he couldn't live without her.

"Well if it isn't the guy every girl seems to be blinded by. " Travis heard Parker say as he walked to him

"Not a good time Parker. " Travis warned. The last thing he needed right now was Parker's shit. He wanted to bash his face in just for being able to take Abby out on dates, while she wouldn't allow Travis to

"What is it about you that all these girls seem to like? To treat them like dirt, and yet they seem to keep coming back for more. "

"Shut the hell up Parker, I don't have time for your jealous shit. "

"Even Abby, the one girl I thought wouldn't fall for your shit. Now she's dumped me because apparently she loves you. We both know that you'll never be good enough for her though, so why can't you just let us be happy?"

"I'm not going to tell you again. I'll bash that pretty little face of yours right now if you don't shut the fuck up. As for Abby, think what you want about me but I love her, just as much as she loves me, and you're right I don't deserve her, but I'll never stop fighting for her. "Travis said with an honest tone. It was the truth, he didn't care what it took but he'd get Abby back. Even if it ended up being the death of him.

"You'll never make her happy. She'll never love you the way she can love a good guy like me. "

That was enough for Travis, stepping closer to Parker he raised his fist and clocked him in the face, forcing him to fall to the ground and with that he fled from the scene. The only thing he cared about right now was finding Abby and begging for a chance. He needed her to understand just how much he loved him, they could make it work, couldn't' they? He needed them too. They make have been a disaster from the start, but they were a beautiful disaster.

"Trav, what's up? " Shep called from behind as Travis started walking to Abby's dorm

"I need to talk to her. " He said, without looking back

"Travis, I'm not sure it's a good idea, I know you love her but America called me a while ago and said Abby was upset. She was crying, and right now she needs some space. "

"What the hell am I supposed to do then? " Travis turned and yelled, not caring who would hear " I love her okay, she gets me in a way that no one else does. She gets under my skin in the worst way, but I wouldn't have it any other way. She calls me out on my shit, as where other girls just act like the way I treat them is okay. She's special, okay? She's beautiful, funny, amazing and as I told her, if there was any woman that was made for me, its her. I can't stop thinking about her, and you can tell me until you are blue in the face to give up, but now that I found her, I'm not letting her go." Travis told his cousin who stood in front of him. He had a shocked look in his face, and Travis knew that his declaration was the last thing shep every expected him to say.

"What can I do to help? " Shep asked, he wasn't going to stop Travis after the speech he made. He'd never seen his cousin this way, and he's been here through all the girls. And he was excited to see where this would go, he hoped for the best for Travis and Abby, and he was going to make sure they both got their happy ever after

"You can get America to get Abby to come to the apartment. I'll have a surprise waiting for her. Make sure she's there in an hour. And not that I don't love you guys but I need her alone." Travis told him and ran, he knew exactly what he needed to do "

Abby sat in the living room of Travis and Shep's apartment. American dragged her here and wouldn't take no for an answer. And after dropping her off, her and Shep bailed leaving her all alone without a way back. All she wanted to do was go home and cry. She didn't want to see Travis it was just too painful. She couldn't do any of this.

"Hey there Pigeon. " Travis greeted her. He stood in the door way holding two dozen roses. One contained white. He walked to her and gave her the flowers and stood and waited for her reaction.

"What are you doing, Trav? "

"I love you, I think I've loved you since the moment I met you and I'm not giving up. So go on, push me away, and tell me we can't be together, but I'm not going anywhere." Travis told her with a soft smile

"Travis, "

"I'm not giving up on us. I won't give up on the greatest thing that I could ever have. And the fact that you're dismissing us before we even have a chance breaks my heart. You're going to end up regretting not giving us a chance. "Travis tried to plead. He just wanted her to try was that so much to ask for?

"I have something else. I'll be right back. "Travis told her and vanished down the hall to his room

What was she doing? What was he doing? He wasn't the Travis she met those months ago. The Travis she knew back then wouldn't be trying so hard for a girl. He'd be moving on to screw the next one. Shouldn't that mean something? She wanted to cry, but she couldn't hide her smile that appeared on her face as she set the flowers on the table. She almost didn't recognize Travis when he came back. He was holding a guitar. She had no idea he played. Did he play or was he just trying to impress her? Why didn't he tell her if he did play? It was all so overwhelming.

"I've been trying to figure out to get you to listen to me, to convince you that we belong together, and I can't figure it out. So I'm hoping this will convince you. " Travis said stepping closer

"Travis, "Abby started but he was already stringing away on the guitar. Forgetting all her thoughts, she just listened to him sing a song that fit them all too well.

_I'm not a perfect person  
There's many things I wish I didn't do  
But I continue learning  
I never meant to do those things to you  
And so I have to say before I go  
That I just want you to know_

I've found a reason for me  
To change who I used to be  
A reason to start over new  
and the reason is you

I'm sorry that I hurt you  
It's something I must live with every day  
And all the pain I put you through  
I wish that I could take it all away  
And be the one who catches all your tears  
That's why I need you to hear

I've found a reason for me  
To change who I used to be  
A reason to start over new  
and the reason is You

and the reason is You

I'm not a perfect person  
I never meant to do those things to you  
And so I have to say before I go  
That I just want you to know

I've found a reason for me  
To change who I used to be  
A reason to start over new  
and the reason is you

I've found a reason to show  
A side of me you didn't know  
A reason for all that I do  
And the reason is you 

As he set the guitar down, he moved to Abby only to find her crying. Reacting on instinct her cupped her face and wiped every tear away.

"Now talk to me, Pidge. I need to know where we stand. "

"Trav, I won't lie to anymore, I do love you, but we can't be together, it's not right. " Abby said, she was mesmerized by the song he just sang for her, she loved everything about what he's done but was it enough to keep their relationship from crashing and burning?

"Then give us a chance. Stop this nonsense. You're torturing the both of us, not just you. Give me a chance. "Not letting her have another word, he grabbed her and pulled her into a kiss, and as much as she wanted to fight it, she knew she'd never be able to resist what she felt for Travis Maddox

_**I hope you enjoyed the chapter. **_

_**Song: The reason by Hoobastank**_


	4. Chapter 4

_**Thank you guys so much for all of your reviews, out of all the stories I'm writing, I'm most inspired and happy to write this. Thank you for bearing with me. I hope the snippets I gave you for this chapter on facebook were good enough to last until I posted this. Excuse the grammar and I hope you enjoy. :D **_

Abby felt Travis's arms tighten around her as they fell to the couch. She was on top of his lap as they continue to make out. She felt confused, a part of her wanted this, craved it, maybe even needed it, but there was also another part of her that was telling her how incredibly wrong this was. There was no way that she and Travis would ever be able to make it as a couple.

"Stop…. "Abby whispered between kisses, she knew she couldn't let it go any further.

"No." Travis told her forcing their lips together.

Abby loved Travis. She wasn't denying that in the slightest bit, but she also knew she couldn't give him false hope about something that would never happen. Something that _couldn't_ happen. She cared about him enough to give him the truth. She loved him enough to let him ago.

"Travis, stop. This can't happen. "Abby told him getting off of his lap and turning, so that she wasn't facing him

"What's wrong Pigeon? " Travis asked, confused. He thought everything he was finally coming together only to find it to be a one sided thing.

"We can't do this, I meant what I said, we can't be together. " Abby said, instantly wanting to take back each word that came from her mouth

"Why not, Abby? Haven't I done enough to prove how much I fucking love you? I'm Travis Maddox, I sleep around, I don't let girls leave me their numbers, and I treat them like dirt. I'll be the first person to admit that to you, but you came along and changed my life. I'm doing everything I possibly can for you to see just how much I love you. Why can't you just give me a chance? Give _us _a chance? "Travis said, beginning to beg, which surprised Abby

"I know you love me, and I love you too, but I'm no good for you. I'm damaged goods. "Abby yelled. She knew her past, and she knew with a guy like Travis, she'd only ruin him the way her father ruined her

"No you're not. Can't you see how amazing you are? "Travis asked her offering her a smile

"Travis, "

"You want to be with me. " Travis said, it wasn't a question "I know it. You can deny it, you can pretend it's not true but it is. You admitted you love me, you dumped Parker, if I'm not the reason for that, then what is? "

"Why are you doing this? " Abby asked him, as she slowly turned around, wiping her tears

"Because you're trying to ruin the one good thing that has ever happened to me, the one thing that makes me want to be a better person. You do that to me, Abby. YOU. Not Megan, not all those other easy girls that I was with, you. Just you." Travis informed her, he wasn't going to let her put him away, it was going to end here and it was going to end now.

"Travis, "

"Just tell me one thing, do you love me? " Travis asked her

Abby let out a big sigh" Yes."

"Then be with me. "

"Can I just have time to think? Everything is moving so fast, and I just need time to think. And I can't do that around you. "

"Promise you won't go running to Parker or any other guy and I'll give you that. I don't want you to be with anyone else. I want you to belong to me the way I belong to you. "Travis declared, surprising her yet again

"Okay. I promise. "She told him, giving him a peck on the cheek. When she opened the front door, she frowned remembering that America and Shep left her with no way to get back

"Trav? "

"Yeah? " He asked, still sitting in his spot on the couch

"Can you give me a ride back? "

He smiled. He'd do anything just to spend more time with her. "Of course. Come on."

It had been hours since Travis dropped her off, and yet she couldn't rid her thoughts of him. She kept thinking of the kiss that took everything to pull away from. What the hell was she going to do? She loved Travis, but was love enough to keep her and Travis from falling apart. From becoming a disaster? She thought about calling America, but she knew that America would only push her farther to Travis, and right now it was the last thing she needed. She told him that she needed time to think, but really what was there to think about, they were a disaster. A beautiful disaster. She needed to clear her head, and right now she needed to be as far away from people as possible. Grabbing her ipod, she put her headphones in her ear and went for a run. After a half an hour of straight running, she finally stopped at a bench in the park. As hard as she tried, she couldn't rid her thoughts of Travis. She needed to, but she couldn't', especially when a song came on her ipod that reminded her of Travis.

_Ever wonder about what he's doing  
How it all turned to lies  
Sometimes I think that it's better to never ask why_

Where there is desire  
There is gonna be a flame  
Where there is a flame  
Someone's bound to get burned  
But just because it burns  
Doesn't mean you're gonna die  
You've gotta get up and try, and try, and try  
Gotta get up and try, and try, and try  
You gotta get up and try, and try, and try

Eh, eh, eh

Funny how the heart can be deceiving  
More than just a couple times  
Why do we fall in love so easy?  
Even when it's not right

Where there is desire  
There is gonna be a flame  
Where there is a flame  
Someone's bound to get burned  
But just because it burns  
Doesn't mean you're gonna die  
You've gotta get up and try, and try, and try  
Gotta get up and try, and try, and try  
You gotta get up and try, and try, and try

Ever worry that it might be ruined  
And does it make you wanna cry?  
When you're out there doing what you're doing  
Are you just getting by?  
Tell me are you just getting by, by, by

Where there is desire  
There is gonna be a flame  
Where there is a flame  
Someone's bound to get burned  
But just because it burns  
Doesn't mean you're gonna die  
You've gotta get up and try, and try, and try  
Gotta get up and try, and try, and try  
You gotta get up and try, and try, and try  
Gotta get up and try, and try, and try  
Gotta get up and try, and try, and try  
You gotta get up and try, and try, and try  
Gotta get up and try, and try, and try

You gotta get up and try, and try, and try  
Gotta get up and try, and try, and try

As the song ended, she took her headphones out of her ears as she pulled her knees to her chin and wrapped her arms around them. Was it a sign that she should try with Travis, or just a sick coincidence?

"Abby. It's about time, I've been looking everywhere for you. "Abby looked up to see America standing in front of her

"Hey, sorry, I've been busy."

"What's going on? " American asked in concern for her best friend

"I don't know, Mare. " She finally admitted

"I know that Travis is my friend, but Abby, you were my friend first, you're my best friend. You can talk to me. "

"I love him, but I find myself still pushing him away. "

"I know. I think you owe it not only to yourself, but to Travis to give it a shot. What's the worst that can happen? "

"I can turn into my father. "

"That won't happen, you won't let that happen, I won't, and most of all neither will Trav." America reasoned with her. She knew of Abby's past but Abby was nothing like her parents.

"So what you're saying is I should forget about it and give him a chance? " Abby questioned

"I'm not saying forget, I mean your past is your past no matter how much you wish you could change it. I'm just saying you shouldn't base your future off of your past. He loves you, you love him go be with him. "America encouraged

In that moment Abby knew, she knew that she wanted to give it a shot. She knew that she wanted to go to him, hold him and never let him go, but as she walked in the door, she saw a familiar face she wished to never see again. Megan. She was standing in the living room, although she was fully clothed, she couldn't think of what had already happened, or what was about to happen. She ran from the apartment and never looked back. Travis was already over her and moving on with Megan.


	5. Chapter 5

_**Thank you guys so much for your reviews and support. I hope you enjoy reading this chapter as much as I enjoyed writing it. **____** Sorry for the grammar mistakes. **_

Travis came to his living from his bedroom where he'd been consumed in thoughts of Abby to find Megan standing there. He hadn't thought about her since he finally admitted all his feelings for Abby, so what the hell was she doing here? He had no desire to be with her whatsoever. Even if it mean living a life of abstinence he wanted nobody, but Abby.

"What the hell, Megan. What are you doing here and how did you get in here? "Travis asked her as he walked to stand in front of her

"I am here because, I miss you Trav. Can't we have fun like we used to? And Shep let me in. Well kind of. He came back to get something, but then left. Told me you were busy, but after he left I just opened the door and it didn't sound like you were busy. "Megan explain, making Travis furious. Who did she think she was just barging in his apartment?

"Get out. " He said in a calm and rational voice

"Come on, don't be like that. Let's just have some fun. " Megan said stepping towards him. Months ago, he would have been all for her throwing herself at him. In that moment though, he just wanted her to leave.

"I'm only going to say this once, so listen carefully. I don't _want _you. I will never _want _you. There's nothing that I can get from you or any of those other girls I slept with. I don't care for any of you, I don't even like any of you. You all had one thing in common, the reason I slept with you guys. You were easy. End of story. "Travis said, he didn't care about hurting her feelings, he didn't care about hurting her at all. He just wanted Abby.

"You don't mean that, do you? " Megan asked quietly, feeling her heart sink lower into her chest.

"I do. " Travis confirmed

"What's so special about her? " Megan asked, knowing that this had everything to do with Abby

"She's Pidge." Travis told her, not needing to say another word. What made Abby special was that she was just Abby.

"I don't like her." Megan said, before even realizing the words came out of her mouth

"You don't have to, because I do. And it's not her that you don't like. It's the fact that I have something with her, it's the fact that I've given her a part of myself that I never gave to you that you don't like. "

"How can you want to be with her, when she won't even give you the time of day? " Megan asked him just as Shep walked through the door

"Anything worth having, is worth fighting for, and Pidge is worth it. We had our thing, its over don't ever come back here, don't call me. I want _her_ not you. Shep, will you see Megan out please? "Travis asked just as he went to the kitchen and poured himself a glass of water. All he wanted was Abby. He wanted her to finally decide what she wanted. He told her he'd give her time to think, but he wasn't sure how much longer he could take it. He just needed her.

"What's going on? " Shep's voice came into the kitchen after kicking Megan out of their apartment

"With Megan? "

Shep said nothing, he just nodded in hopes that Travis didn't screw everything up with Abby in a moment of weakness.

"If you're asking if I slept with her, the answer is no. I know I'm an asshole, but I'd never do that to Pigeon. She was here when I walked out here from my bedroom, she told me that you wouldn't let her in so she just came in after she left. "

"Sorry, Trav. Had I known she didn't leave I would have never left. I only left long enough to take America to the dorms. Abby texted her and told her she needed her. "

"Is everything okay? " Travis asked worriedly, in hopes that nothing happened to Abby

"I'm not sure. I think she just needed a friend to talk to. "Shep explained to Travis.

"What is the matter? " America asked coming into Abby's dorm to find her crying. When she'd left her this morning, she had finally admitted that she wanted to be with Travis. Really be with him. Yet here she was in a depressing state.

"He was with her. " Abby blurted out as her tears fell harder

"What do you mean? " America asked confused.

"Travis. He was with Megan. Or at least she was at his house. I went there after I talked with you and when I opened the door Megan was standing in the living room. "Abby explained as she remembered opening the door

"When you say with do you mean he slept with her? "

"I don't know. "

"What do you mean you don't know? Abby you did stay there long enough to find out what was going on didn't you? Please tell me that you didn't jump to a conclusion. "America begged of her

Abby couldn't look at her because the truth was, she had jumped to a conclusion. She did what she always did, she ran away. "I saw her, and I just ran. No one even knew I was there."

"God what is the matter with you? Was she naked? "

"No."

"Was Travis?"

"I don't know. I didn't see him." Abby told her, immediately feeling guilty for assuming the worst in Travis, yet again.

Before America had a chance to say anything Abby's phone began to ring, without thinking she answered.

"Hello."

"Hey, Pigeon. Have you thought about it yet? "

"Trav, I can't. It's not wise for us to be together."

"But.."

"I have to go." Then she hung up

"Abby what are you doing? He didn't sleep with her and you're being really selfish right now. "

"Maybe I'm trying to do what is best for him, Mare." Abby defended but deep down America was right. She was Megan and freaked.

"Let's go. " America said grabbing Abby's wrist in a death grip

"No." Abby fought back, knowing exactly where she would be taking her

"No, you're not running from this anymore. You're going to talk to him if I have to lock the two of you in a room together, all this back and forth, this loving each other, then hurting each other, it ends now. "America said, and Abby no longer fought her. She just got in her car and let her drive her to the apartment. But that didn't stop the nervousness she felt. As she walked inside, she put her headphones in her ear in hopes that she could tune it out. But again, the songs just reminded her of Travis, especially the one that was now blasting in her ear.

_He drowns in his dreams  
An exquisite extreme I know  
He's as damned as he seems  
And more heaven than a heart could hold  
And if I try to save him  
My whole world could cave in  
It just ain't right  
It just ain't right_

Oh and I don't know  
I don't know what he's after  
But he's so beautiful  
Such a beautiful disaster  
And if I could hold on  
Through the tears and the laughter  
Would it be beautiful?  
Or just a beautiful disaster

He's magic and myth  
As strong as what I believe  
A tragedy with  
More damage than a soul should see  
And do I try to change him?  
So hard not to blame him  
Hold on tight  
Hold on tight

Oh 'cause I don't know  
I don't know what he's after  
But he's so beautiful  
Such a beautiful disaster  
And if I could hold on  
Through the tears and the laughter  
Would it be beautiful?  
Or just a beautiful disaster

I'm longing for love and the logical  
But he's only happy hysterical  
I'm waiting for some kind of miracle  
Waited so long  
So long

He's soft to the touch  
But frayed at the end he breaks  
He's never enough  
And still he's more than I can take

Oh 'cause I don't know  
I don't know what he's after  
But he's so beautiful  
Such a beautiful disaster  
And if I could hold on  
Through the tears and the laughter  
Would it be beautiful?  
Or just a beautiful disaster

He's beautiful  
Such a beautiful disaster

"You." America said as she dragged an unhappy Abby inside and pointed to Travis, who just looked at them with wide eyes.

"What's going on? " Shep asked as America took Abby's IPod. There was no way she was going to let her avoid this any longer

"I'm tired of the two of you going back and forth. Every time one of you is ready to commit the other one has a foot out of the door. It ends here."

"Mare, can I please just go home? " Abby begged, unable to make eye contact with Travis

"No. You're going to tell him. "America said

"Tell me what? " Travis asked, curiously

Abby said nothing, which infuriated not only him but America as well.

"Fine, you don't want to talk, I'll tell him. Abby and I had a little conversation this morning she finally admitted that she wanted to be with you. She came to tell you, and when she opened the door, Megan was here. As usual she jumped to a conclusion and ran away. "

"America! " Abby chided. She suddenly felt naked.

"You thought I slept with her? " Travis asked, his tone was angry.

"I don't know."

"What the hell is wrong with you can't you see how much I'm trying here? I haven't even looked at another woman since the night we made love. Okay? I love you, I love you I fucking love you Abby. Do you need me to go tell the entire world because I will? I'll go to the closest bar, the closest the restaurant, I'll stand on top of a god damn table and tell everyone how completely and utterly in love with you I am if that's what it will take for you to give us a chance. Megan means nothing to me, I feel nothing for her. I didn't sleep with her, I didn't even know she was here until I came out of my bedroom and kicked her out. Ask Shep, he came in on it. "

"It's true Abby. I never thought I'd see the day, but he loves you. "

"I." Abby started, but she couldn't finished. She was too overwhelmed with emotions to know what to say.

"Will you please just talk to me? " Travis begged, but still she said nothing

"Abby, please stop torturing yourself. Stop torturing him, be with him. "America encouraged, yet she said nothing still.

It was enough for Travis, he went to her put her over his shoulder and took her to his room. They were going to work this out. And if it went as well as Travis hoped, they'd be together by the end of the conversation

_**Thanks for reading: D **_

_**Song: Beautiful Disaster by Kelly Clarkson **_


	6. Chapter 6

_**Thank you guys for reading yet again. I know I put a song in like every chapter and if you're wondering why it's because music means something to me. I feel that expressing feelings through music is a great way for Abby and Travis to come back together, but I promise there's not going to be a song in every one. So I'm sorry if you don't like that but it is my story: D Excuse the grammar and enjoy.**_

Abby turned around on Travis's bed, where he set her down, so she wasn't facing him. She could bear to face him. She thought about how selfish she was being by pushing him away. She hated how things had gotten so complicated, she did love Travis, so why couldn't she just let his love in.

"At some point, you're going to have to turn around and face me. " She heard Travis say "You can sit there all night, for all I care. I've got time"

"I can't." Abby told him. She didn't know how any of this got so out of hand. All her and Travis were ever supposed to be were friends.

"Please, stop pushing me away, please just let me in. The way you did when we became friends. "Travis begged her as she remembered the talks they used to have

"I can't, I can't seem to stop as much as I want to Travis." She finally admitted. It's not as if she wanted to push him away, it was just an instinct to not let her past collide with her future

"Will you please look at me?" Travis begged her. He was no longer upset with her. Sure, he was angry that she jumped to a conclusion with Megan, but he wasn't so much angry at her. He was more confused than anything else. The one girl he wanted to be with was the one who seemed to be pushing him away.

Abby sighed, as she slowly shifted her body so her legs were dangling off his bed and her front was finally facing him. She looked up at him to find him gazing at her with a soft expression, but his eyes looked sad.

"I love you, and I know you love me. So what's the problem? You were ready to tell me you wanted to try before seeing Megan, so what's the problem now?"

"I don't know. I saw her and I just….. "

"You just what? "

"I thought you moved on. I thought I pushed you too far that you didn't want to wait for me anymore." Abby admitted to Travis and he kneeled down and took her hands in his

"Listen, I don't blame you for automatically seeing the worst in me. Given my track record, you have every right to assume the worst, but Pigeon, I'd never do that to you. I know I screwed up that time I heard you and America talking then picked up those too girls and brought them back here, but I only did that because I was hurt at what you said. It doesn't excuse what I did but I want you to know I would never do that again. I know this hard for you, and I'm not here to push you. Megan though, I don't want her, not even just for sex. I'd take five minutes with just talking to you then a whole night of sex with her. You're everything to me and I'm begging you not to walk away. "

"I love you Travis." She said the words before she could realize they'd come out

"Then what's the problem?"

"I'm scared. " She admitted. She couldn't fight the intensity of the feelings she had for this man anymore. She couldn't fight her emotions, she just wanted to be honest and that's what she was going to do.

"Of what? " Travis asked, frowning. What was there to be afraid of when they loved each other so completely?

"Getting hurt. Travis, you've been with a lot of girls, and now all of sudden you're in love with me. Before you decide to protest, I'm not at all saying that you don't love me, because I know you do. I'm just saying that how long until the passion and fire you have for me burns out? How long until someone all too willing comes along, how long until someone prettier, and better comes along? And where would that leave me? I never wanted to fall for you, Travis. I didn't even like you at first but now you're all I think about and it scares me. "Abby admitted as she let the tears she was holding back fall down

Travis didn't say anything at first, he just brought his hand to her cheek and wiped about her tears. He hadn't realized all the reasons she pushed him away were because of his past. How could she ever for one second think he'd leave her for anyone else? Standing and pulling Abby off the bed, he framed her face between his hands and stared passionately into her pretty eyes.

"I love _you._ I know that my past isn't perfect, and I know I've done a lot of shitty things. I can't promise that everything in the future will be perfect because I'm far from perfect. I can promise you though that I'll do my damnest to make you happy. I just want you. I don't care about who walks in the door, she can be blonde, skinny and tall, but she's not you. She's not my Pigeon. She doesn't test me the way you do, or get under my skin like you, she doesn't love me the way you do. I don't care about any girl except for you. You're my forever. "Travis declared to her, shocking her yet again. She hadn't expected him to say anything near what he told her.

"Promise me? " Abby found herself saying

"What am I promising?" Travis asked

"Promise that no matter what happens, you won't hurt me." Abby begged him. She knew that she couldn't take being hurt again. Not the way her father had hurt her.

"I would never do anything to ever hurt you, baby. I love you."

"Will you hold me? " Abby asked him just wanting to be close to him. To feel the warmth of his skin, to feel the traces of his kisses. She just wanted to be with Travis. She was done pushing him away

"Not yet. Tell me where do we stand? "

"I want to be with you Travis, God know I've fought it but I can't live without you. I just don't want to be hurt. I can't bear it."

"I won't hurt you. I'd cut off my arm and both of my legs before I did that."

Abby only smiled. She knew Travis would never intentionally hurt her, but the intensity of what she felt for him, still scared her.

"I know. "

"Come here, now let me hold you. " Travis said, pulling her to the bed

She fell asleep listening to him softly sing yet another song to her.

_You know I'd fall apart without you  
I don't know how you do what you do  
'Cause everything that don't make sense about me  
Makes sense when I'm with you_

Like everything that's green, girl, I need you  
But it's more than one and one makes two  
Put aside the math and the logic of it  
You gotta know you're wanted too

'Cause I wanna wrap you up  
Wanna kiss your lips  
I wanna make you feel wanted  
And I wanna call you mine  
Wanna hold your hand forever  
And never let you forget it  
Yeah, I, I wanna make you feel wanted

Anyone can tell you you're pretty, yeah  
And you get that all the time, I know you do  
But your beauty's deeper than the make-up  
And I wanna show you what I see tonight...

When I wrap you up  
When I kiss your lips.  
I I wanna make you feel wanted  
And I wanna call you mine  
Wanna hold your hand forever  
And never let you forget it  
'Cause, baby, I, I wanna make you feel wanted

As good as you make me feel  
I wanna make you feel better  
Better than your fairy tales  
Better than your best dreams  
You're more than everything I need  
You're all I ever wanted  
All I ever wanted

And I just wanna wrap you up  
Wanna kiss your lips  
I wanna make you feel wanted  
And I wanna call you mine  
Wanna hold your hand forever  
And never let you forget it  
Yeah, I wanna make you feel wanted  
Baby, I wanna make you feel wanted

You'll always be wanted 

_**Song: Wanted by hunter Hayes **_


	7. Chapter 7

_**I don't think I particularly like this chapter, but I'll post anyways. Thanks so much for reading, and all your reviews. Now the grammar is gonna suck i already know that because My computer crashed a few days ago so i had to go out and get another one, and I can't seem to find my other writing programs so until I do I'm stuck with word pad. Please just bear with me here. I'm so sorry. :/**_

Abby sat on the bed, opposite to Travis, so that she was no longer facing him. She couldn't bear to look at him right now. She let him hold her, she confessed her fears, but now she was feeling worse then ever. It wouldn't never last, would it? She wanted to turn around, to run into his strong, tattooed arms and let him hold her, but there was still something holding her back, something that she wasn't quite ready to face yet. And that was that her future in a way collided with her past. The drinking, the fighting, everything led back to everything she ran away from. Yet here it was standing in front of her and she didn't want to say no. She heard Travis sigh loudly as he walked to the bed and sat next to her. He said nothing as she laid his head on her lap and began to look up at her with the eyes she loved so much.  
"Why are you fighting it? " Travis asked her as he looked at her with a hurt expression. All he wanted was to be able to be with the one girl he'd do anything for. The first girl he ever developed feelings for, he wanted it all and yet she didn't.  
"I told you why, Trav. I don't want to get hurt and I'm afraid that we're such a disaster that one of is bound to get hurt. "  
"I'm not saying that we aren't but we're a beautiful disaster. You saved me from all my bad boy habbits, I never once thought I'd ever be able or even want to feel everything I feel when I'm with you. Before I met you, I cared about one thing, me. I didn't care about anything else. I even bought you a dog, a dog I let stay with me. That's how much you mean to me, Pige, I wouldn't do it for any other girl. I know that you're scared, you think I'm not? I'm afraid that you're going to wake up and see that you can do so much better than me, but I'm selfish and I don't want to give you up, and I'll take you any way I can get you."  
"There's no one better for me then you, Trav. "  
"What about Parker? " Travis snapped, from day one he hated that Parker and Abby were ever a thing.  
"Even Parker wasn't. I'll admit when I first started seeing him, there was something there, I thought I felt something for him. I was wrong that first time with you , the touch of his lips on my mine, replulsed me. I was kissing him, but I was thinking about you. The way you touched me in a way that no one ever has, the way your eyes pierce into me when we were together, the way it felt with your arms wrapped around me, the way you madelove to me. It was then that I realized how completely in love with you I was. Parker, he's a good guy, but my heart is with you. After that date with him, I felt discusted after kissing him. It wasn't so much that I was discusted with him, but I just didn't feel for him what I did when we first went on dates. Travis, its you, it's always been you and it always will be. " Abby confessed as she ran her fingers through his hair.  
"Then can we try, give us chance, we'll shine like th stars in the sky. "  
"Trav, " Abby began to say but before given a chance, he sat up and kissed her lips, pulling her to his lap.  
"Say yes. " Travis begged, as he pulled their lips away from each other and softly ran a finger down her jawline  
"I can't. "  
"What can I do to change your mind? "  
"What do you want to me with me for anyways? "  
"You're my everything, Abby. I'm far from perfect, I know that. I'm a man whore, I drink to much, so many people fear me because of my fighting, I'm not saying that I'm perfect, I can tel you though that I'd never hurt you. I love you so much that it hurts. You consume me. That morning after we made love and I found you gone, I was crushed, I almost destroyed this apartment, you did that to me. And I'm not saying that to make you feel guilty, only to make you see tha no girl has gotten under my skin like you do. I'm not good with words, so here. " Travis said, handing her his ipod after choosing a song he knew would be perfect for the situation.

All I know  
Is everything is not as it's sold  
but the more I grow the less I know  
And I have lived so many lives  
Though I'm not old  
And the more I see, the less I grow  
The fewer the seeds the more I sow

Then I see you standing there  
Wanting more from me  
And all I can do is try  
Then I see you standing there  
Wanting more from me  
And all I can do is try

I wish I hadn't seen all of the realness  
And all the real people are really not real at all  
The more I learn, the more I learn  
The more I cry, the more I cry  
As I say goodbye to the way of life  
I thought I had designed for me

Then I see you standing there  
Wanting more from me  
And all I can do is try  
Then I see you standing there  
I'm all I'll ever be  
But all I can do is try  
Try

All of the moments that already passed  
We'll try to go back and make them last  
All of the things we want each other to be  
We never will be  
And that's wonderful, and that's life  
And that's you, baby  
This is me, baby  
And we are, we are, we are, we are  
Free  
In our love  
We are free in our love  
I don't feel like this is a good chapter, I'm not sure I like it all to be honest. But here you go. Thanks for all your kind words and reviews you guys rock. Now I tried my best with Editing, but he program i use for writing I don't have acess to right now. My computer crashed so i had to get a new one so tonight i had to settle for word pad. So I'm deeply sorry.

After taking the headphones out of her ear, Abby knew that she couldn't no longer resist him. Tossing the ipod asside, she pulled him into a kiss. She ran her hands through his hair as he softly pushed her back so she was laying on the bed. There were no longer any words that needed to be said, all that mattered was the two of them, neither one of them had the strenght to fight the intensity of what they felt. It was time to stop resisting and start loving.

"I love you. " Travis said to Abby as he held her in his arms after their love making. He couldn't believe any of it was real. He was too afraid to close his eyes, or let her go because if he did, she'd be gone.  
"I love you too, you should get some sleep, baby. " Abby encouraged as she saw the sleepiness in his eyes and the darkness in the sky  
"I don't want to. " Travis admitted, maybe just a bit too fast  
"Why?"  
"I'm afraid of waking up and you being gone, I don't want it to all have been a dream."  
Putting her hands on each side of his face, so she was framing his face, Abby gave him a kiss, "I'm not leaving, I love you, and I know I've made mistakes but I'm ready to be with you, Trav. I love you and I don't want to fight my feelings anymore. "  
With that final statement, they fell asleep in each others arms.


	8. Chapter 8

_**After watching the most recent episode of the vampire Diaries, I decided I was going to cheer myself up by writing a new chapter now that I've got my word program back. I hope you enjoy. Thank you guys so much for you reviews and all your support it means a lot to me. Enjoy ;)**_

The glare of the sun from outside the window awoke Abby from her sleep. She was laying on her stomach, in Travis's bed, still naked from their love making. She began to smile as she felt butterfly kisses trail down her back. She was sure that he had no idea she was awake because he began to talk to her.

"I love you so much, Pigeon. I promise that I'm going to be a man that you deserve, someone worthy of your love. I promise that I'm going to become someone you can trust. I love you that much. I love you enough to always show you how much you mean to me. I promise I'll never so much as to even look at another girl. I love you, and I'll do whatever it takes. "Travis declared to a supposed to be sleeping Abby, then kissed her and headed to the shower.

As she turned and made sure Travis was really gone, Abby couldn't help the smile that appeared on her face. God, did she love that man, tattoos and all. She loved everything about him. For so long she tried to push him away, and yet her she was in his bed, still naked. He even told her he loved her, what happened to the Travis Maddox she met all those months ago? Getting off the bed, she wrapped the white sheet around her naked body and went to the window, she could look out into the beautiful day forever with the mood she was in. It was sunny day, and she was happy. She had everything she could ever want, it just didn't get any better than this. Hearing Travis's phone ring, distracted her from her thoughts. She found it in his pants pockets on the floor, it was an unknown number, and she had no idea whether she should answer or not. Were her and Travis even there yet? What if it was important though? As she answered the phone, she'd hoped Travis wouldn't get upset.

"Hello? " Abby answered in an all too cheerful voice

"Um, hi. Uh, Is Travis there by chance? "A female's voice asked

"He's kind of in the shower right now." Abby explained

"Um who is this? " The voice questioned

Feeling uncomfortable to where the conversation was headed, Abby sighed "Abby."

"Good. Then we can have a little chat. Travis is never going to stay with you, he's a hot, popular guy around here, and you're a nobody. Why would you ever think that you were different than any of the rest of us? "

"You don't know what you're talking about, you don't know him like I do. " Abby said in barely a whisper

"Listen, I don't meant to come off as such a bitch, but the truth is you should just get while you can, Travis isn't the commitment type so just give up while you can. "

"You don't know anything about our relationship, I think you're the one who should give up. " Abby responded, just as Travis came in the room.

"Here" She said and handed him the phone and then crossed the room back to the window

Travis didn't know much, but he knew from Abby's attitude change that whoever was on the other end of this phone wasn't someone to be happy to talk to.

"Hello? " Travis answered, still observing Abby. He just wanted to take her in his arms one more time

"Hey you. " Megan greeted

"What do you want? "

"Listen, maybe I can come over tonight. I know you know how to show a girl a good time. "He heard Megan say, but he only got frustrated, he wanted nothing to do with her, yet he couldn't get rid of her

"No, look I told you to stop with this, I'm with Abby, not just for sex, but we're together emotionally and physically, not that it's your business. I love her, and you just need to stop calling, otherwise you'll regret it. "Travis said

"But… "

"But nothing, she's special to me, she my girlfriend not my fuck buddy so give it up. You're easy go find another guy to show you a good time. Bye. "Travis snapped, hung up and tossed the phone on the bed

Travis stared at Abby, who made no effort to turn around. He could tell she was slowly slipping away again, and he knew that Megan had said something to her. He knew that he had to erase all the doubt that was planted in her mind before she gave up and ran. Crossing the room, he put his arms around her, and placed his chin on her shoulder. She tensed

"What are you thinking about? "

She said nothing.

"You look beautiful." Travis told her, hoping she'd talk to him

She still stayed silent

"Pigeon? You okay? "Travis asked

"I'm fine. " Abby finally said, as she turned around and walked to the bed, still holding the sheet to her body

"I'm sorry. "

"It's okay, Trav."

"No, it's not. I just want you to know that it doesn't matter what she says, or what any other girl that I've been with says to you, I love you and you can't let them put doubt in your mind. What did she say to you?"

"It doesn't matter." Abby assured him. The last thing she wanted to do was be the insecure girlfriend who let his exes get to her

"It does matter, she upset you, It's written all over her face, and I want to know what she said."

"Really, Trav, I'm fine. " Abby assured him, but she wasn't. She didn't want to have to deal with his exes constantly making her feel not good enough for Travis

"Hey, talk to me. " Travis begged, sitting next to her and cupping her face with his hands

"She just said that sooner or later, you'd get bored, you're not really the type to settle down and you'd leave me. I'm a nobody and you're a hot, popular guy. I'm nothing. "

Abby watched as Travis's face fell, the anger and hurt in his brown eyes. He looked as if he wanted to murder someone. "Pidge, that's not true. I love you. And I'd never get bored with you. You're not a nobody, hell if it wasn't me who was after you from day one, every guy on campus would be asking you for your number. Don't listen to her, okay? "

"I just don't want to have to compete with them? "

"What do you mean?" Travis questioned not sure who she was referring to.

"The girls, I don't want to compete with them. I don't want to wake up and say, am I keeping Travis happy, and am I as good as the girls he's been with before me were?"

"Hey, don't do that. Don't you ever try to compete with them? I don't want that, I want you. Just you Abby. Not Megan, not anyone else. I love _you. _"

Abby sighed heavily as she narrowed a look to Travis "I'm sorry, I just want us to last, and I feel like at any moment, It's all going to come crashing down."

"If it does, I'll be there to catch you. Okay? Can trust me enough to know that I love you more than anything in the entire world, trust me enough to know that I'll do whatever it takes to make sure we're both on the same page in our relationship." Travis informed her. He didn't know much but he knew that he wanted not just a relationship with Abby, but a life. He wanted her forever and always as long as he lived. He never wanted to know what it felt to live a life with her absence.

"I do Trust you, I love you so much."

"What do you say, we blow off classes today, and take a personal day, just you and me. I can show you just how much we'll be together forever. "Travis said

"I can't skip classes, Trav."

"Sure you can. " Travis said with a smirk as he planted a kiss on her neck

"Okay, what are we going to do? "

"Well first, I'm going to make love to you, then I'm going to make you breakfast and we're going to go on a ride on my motorcycle far, far away, wherever it will take us. Nothing from either of our pasts, just you and me Pigeon. "Travis said, lifting her in his arms and placing her in the middle of the bed

"Such a romantic. "

"My girl deserves the best. " Travis said, removing the sheet from around Abby's body as she removed the towel from his.

"I love you Trav." Abby confessed

"I love you too."


	9. Chapter 9

_Hey Guys, I really just want to give you a HUGE apology for starting this story and not updating for a while. Don't think that I'm letting the story go, because I'm not. The truth is that my life has been crazy, not only am I going through some crazy family things at the moment, but I'm working on revising my first book so I can publish in the fall. Care to support it you can like my page at Author Ada Slowe._

_Anyways back to my point, I love each and every one of you and I would NEVER start a story and not finish, I've just got to get the craziness under control and make some time for some Fanfiction writing. I promise that it will come soon, just please don't give up on it. I'm SO sorry. I love you guys. Have a great night._


End file.
